Archive for the ‘Nigel’ Category

1983-11-04 Nigel Terrett

Friday, November 4th, 1983

Nigel Terrett

‘I had it once and lost it’, he said, as we sat over lunch.
And I said that, ‘I have it again, after loosing it…’
and I wondered how to share it with him…what to say.

WANT IT, my brother, like you’ve never wanted ANYTHING.
want it until you would risk ridicule, insanity and death for it.
Utterly want it, without reservation or doubt, for what are these
but the fear that we’ll loose something of lesser value?
Stake everything on it, on its existence…
Your reason, your logic, your common sense, you dignity, your friends.

If you want it utterly, they ALL must be at risk.
Risk everything and KNOW that you are gambling
know that you could loose
know that you could be completely wrong about it
and risk that too.

Don’t think of it as a part time occupation that you do
after the working hours and the family evenings are over
Instead, see those moments as the grist
that passes thru the mill of your life
and you life as nothing but an impassioned search for it.
and, in your passion, you will find it.

And you will scare your family terribly
and risk you livelihood and your sanity
and you’ll feel insecurity rising around you
like a creeping tide from hell
and. many times, you won’t know
if your’re falling over the edge of your sanity
or stumbling into your rebirth…and it doesn’t matter.

Go for it, utterly, all alone, without reservation
what else is there?

04 nov 83
– good advice, wish I could keep it.

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —