SamadhiMuse

            Take this cup of love away
            I no longer think I’m able
            to partake of the feast of life
            while seated at love’s table

               Slow charades of the past
               we walk thru
               looking on the forms we’ve turned
               the surfaces of our lives

            These weeks and months
            wait on the seasons of our heart to turn
            tender touches and looks of loss
            the actors turning to dust

                                 gallagher
                                 26 feb 75
                                 Buena Park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

                       Phones and Showers
         Gut churned morning
           when I wake and all bets are off
         Cathy said I needed a big hurt
           and Rose obliged the next day.

         “It all just happened”, Dennis,
           “He touched me like I usually don’t let you
           so I could prove what
           I seldom let you prove to me;
           that I’m desirable.
           But its OK, it was just
           comforting he gave me,
           somehow, it seemed, then, I needed it,
           for your best wasn’t good enough.”

         No faith when I needed you, but, you’re right,
           I was trying to separate us easily
           and play at a bit of machismo too
         and you called my bluff.

         Thank you, I think…
           I’d forgotten how hard
         those single games could get
           but now I should make it;
              no one could possibly kick me
                 that hard again.

                              gallagher
                              23 Mar 75
                              Buena Park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

           I’ve tried so hard to be up front, Baby,
           knowing the others don’t understand me
           or believe me…and hoping you did.
           But if I never hear your voice on that phone again
           or see you step from the shower
           washing him away…saying,
           “We just went to dinner, Dennis.”
           It will be far too soon.

           Why couldn’t you be up front, Baby?
           and not waste my time like that
           making all my efforts at honesty
           into just a pitiful taste in my mouth
           so that I’m reduced to wondering why
           I didn’t hurt you first.
           Why I waited, out of reluctance,
           so we could share the bitter pill equally
           and together
           as the way of least hurt for both of us?

           Word fail me now
           I just see showers…and his hands
           and your game…as if I were Eric
           and as if I wasn’t worth your effort
           to be up front, always and forever.
           Its cold here in this reality
           you’ve made for us.

                           gallagher
                           25 mar 75
                           Buena Park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

            Today I learned to love my wife
            though she touched another
            and I give thanks
            for one more crutch removed.

            Today, love was the same love
            but my fear was less.

            Love’s beginning to overwhelm me
            and my control’s slipping.
            Today machismo and jealousy
            were found to be just forms
            which but poorly define
            the word love.

            Today, faith, such an anathema
            to the preservation of my ego,
            carried me off a little further
            into the total chaos of oneness.

                           gallagher
                           26 mar 75
                           Buena Park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

                          A little drunk

         Been watching her, hoping it wasn’t a paranoid dream
           been watching close cause it hurt so bad.
         It was hard to see, but since she went out,
           its not been the same with us.

         She takes me for granted now because she saw my pain
           she walks around me and fills the air
         with words of love
           but touches me with nothing.

         Tonight I thought to spend my time with her
           but she fell asleep on me
         tonight I bought wine for her
           but she fell asleep.

         I trust my sight and its clear what I see here
           she believes me in her power
             but my pride won’t let it be.

         Let her go then, I say, to drink the night away
           and never fall asleep with someone else.
         I’m worth more than this, my pride is telling me.

           I’m worth more than this, its time to be free.

         I trust my sight and its plain to see
           that what she feels for me
             is not what I’d have it be.

                                 gallagher
                                 28 mar 75
                                 Buena Park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

                        Bruce Malsom

      I’m less somehow, for his leaving, my spirit brother …
      same eyes as my eyes   same spirit as my spirit
      He’s gone into the world again, at this conjunction’s end, drifting
      amid the tides of change, each of ours alone.

      Same eyes as my eyes   same spirit as my spirit
      some part of me gone, my brother, some part …
      clear seeing, true spirit and grace until we meet again,
      thru illusion and change, immutable essences of that
      which makes us brothers, one.

                              gallagher
                              10 Aug 76 - about my friend
                              buena park, CA

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

            Late 20’s general panic comin’ down
            the easy living givin’ way to the constant frown
            worrying’ about jobs and what we’re going’ be
            the steady erosion of that centered concept, me.

            Maya ever beckons, beckons the pilgrims on
            to embrace their lifeless caricatures
            from which their souls have long been gone.

            I resist your involvement
            the blood sucking drain
            the ultimate material involvement
            in the giant corporate game.

                                    gallagher
                                    16 aug 76 - buena park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

         There’s no time, there is no reason
         I’m lost in the turn of the year.

         I want to cry out for some season
         where the wind blows slower apace.

         I cannot find what I’m here for
         and it seems the quest is lost
         amid the hurrying moments and fragments
         and, ah, how I fear this loss…

         Another life lost here on this rock
         speck in God’s eye
         another lesson to be learned once again then
         and still the wind refused to die.

         The hours and minutes fill up
         and the material world’s catching hold
         every time I look in the mirror
         I see I’m growing old.

         How, how did you catch me
         sly devil that you are
         in this place where the wind never slackens
         and only I can hear the mirror sigh.

         I’m not here to fill in the pattern
         or lay another stone on the way
         I want to live as if it mattered
         and when I die I want to go away.

                           gallagher
                           20 aug 76 - buena park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

         My friends and all our questions
         our eyes and all we say
         we’re all empty and full of the question
         we’re all alone with nothing to say.

         Bruce and Mike and Cher
         have come here as my friends
         and now that they’ve left again
         I’ve just some bits and ends.

         So empty of answers
         that questions no longer hold much lure
         I mourn my having to work now
         because I know that money’s no cure.

         The lesson’s get harder at childhood’s end
         I hope that we’re able, myself and friends
         to survive in a world without the words or time
         to grow older and wiser without feeling like crying.

                                 gallagher
                                 20 aug 76 - buena park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

         Empty   Empty   Empty
         not growing.
         Remembering, not knowing.
         Sad, about what?
         nothing…
         Mad about everything
         no alternative?
         look how the year walks by me
         no focus, who am I?…
         just the space around which
         the identification, Dennis Gallagher, exists
         in whatever form I last left it
         who am I, the one pressing in or out or both?
         what’s direction…
            complexity’s increase,
            knowledge’s gain,
            material’s owner?
         empty of even questions
            I exist and see only
            the falling leaves of years
            in the lines of my face
         what do I want
            what can I have?
         what will I do
            what can be done?
         do I have a choice
            am I not one?

                                    gallagher
                                    20 aug 76 - buena park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —