SamadhiMuse » 1984

1984-01-05 Kathy M.

Dennis — Thu, 05 Jan 1984 08:00:00 +0000

Kathy M.

Shall I write you Kathy…
water for a thirsty man… just beyond my reach
the potential for passion with you
presses thru the air between us

These months have brought no relief
for my fantasy and longing
conversations snatched between games
smiles that touched me to the quick

I feel the current between us
that only hands against skin
can release.

gallagher
01 jan 84
Irvine

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1984-01-05

Dennis — Thu, 05 Jan 1984 08:02:00 +0000

I read my poetry from ten years ago
and I wonder if I’m becoming a shell of myself
that which is consciousness shirking within
that which is physical.

I’m more wood than quicksilver
more container than content
The growing gone,
the coalescing begun.

The bursts of unbearable insight
given way to impassioned remembering.

gallagher
5 jan 84
Irvine, CA

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1984-01-05

Dennis — Thu, 05 Jan 1984 08:03:00 +0000

My pen comes to paper and meets the virgin linen
thoughts like birds swirl and plunge
pulling up and away before this white expanse.

Corridors passed, things glimpsed…
this year is that, some tentative bird,
the year without women.

Freddie gives up grass and then liquor
for a year each time to flex his control
and I, I lay patient before my life’s unfolding
and find myself without them… the women.

gallagher
5 Jan 84
Irvine, CA

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1984-01-07

Dennis — Sat, 07 Jan 1984 08:00:00 +0000

That she can welcome me home
after tripping
with no more in her voice
than concern that I drive careful
says a lot

Like wood that weathers the winter
so whether we…

7 Jan 84
LSD with Freddie
Irvine, CA

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1984-01-09 Re: 7 Jan 84, tripping

Dennis — Mon, 09 Jan 1984 08:00:00 +0000

Re: 7 Jan 84, tripping

The new year’s come to me
something’s going to stir
the stones are coming down
between me and my dream realities

I dropped acid with Freddie
and went as far into it as…
madness and dissolution
I sighed and I waited,
I cannot be disassembled.

I doubt acid holds magic for me anymore
flaming destruction of ego and boundaries
I just wait and survive
proof again of both sanity and folly

We share our roots, Freddie and I
but our futures lie ahead.

gallagher
9 jan 84
Irvine, CA

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1984-01-12

Dennis — Thu, 12 Jan 1984 08:00:00 +0000

   Damn it! I’m getting tired of patience compassion and meditation.
   I want some lightning and thunder, some trauma and triumph.
   I’m tired of being on hold.
   Whatever it is I’m supposed to sort out isn’t coming to me
   everyone’s deflecting; wishy-washy.
   I exercise, I work, I wait and I read.
   I love, I age, I lose myself for days at a time.
   I want to put the hammer down NOW!
   And say, ‘See me, confront me, deal with me’.
   Wear me life, don’t just let me age away in a plastic bag.
                                 gallagher
                                 12 jan 84
                                 Irvine, CA

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1984-01-24

Dennis — Tue, 24 Jan 1984 08:00:00 +0000

Wisps of time … memories and music
eyes across the years … feelings.
Cool breezes in far away places
sunlight in photographs … traces.

It’s snowing in Vancouver.

Gallagher
24 Jan 84

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1984-01-26 Kathy M. II

Dennis — Thu, 26 Jan 1984 08:00:00 +0000

Kathy M. II

Don’t smile unless you’ll touch me,
I can’t bear to look away.
The feelings your smiles give me,
they just make me want to play.

Play in a dance of feelings
of skin and hands so warm
of sharing secret places
of stomachs glowing warm.

gallagher
01-26-84
Irvine

1984-01-30 Kathy M. III

Dennis — Mon, 30 Jan 1984 08:00:00 +0000

Kathy M. III

Come around again, heart in flames
going down again, before brown eyes.
empty response…you leave me no less

I risked, open and knowing,
and I cannot loose, doing this
I walked with elated anticipation and warmth
into her response
and the emptiness it gave me

Her compassion and friendship exchanged
for my passion
her reason and values arrayed
against my poetry

her brown eyes and warm skin
now so unreachable
In the warm and dappled sunlight
she told me how it was

Life,
life, press me as you will
my skin and my feelings and my heart
will stay open

I won’t turn away from you
or what you pass before me
These hands, this heart…
they will feel

I love, I hurt, I live
and I am real and I will be no less.

gallagher
30 jan 84
Irvine

1984-01-30 Kathy M. IV

Dennis — Mon, 30 Jan 1984 08:02:00 +0000

Kathy M. IV

Engraved like stuben glass, her face
against the sunlight … telling me no
she wasn’t confused about how she felt
about me
about her marriage and her life, yes…
but about me, … no ….

I could have wished it otherwise
my emptiness told me
but I came here for the truth
either way … to feel it,
to embrace it.

Even now I want to run and say, ’stay’,
that I can be JUST friends
share smiles and lunches and friendship
endure for the magic of your smiles
and the candor of your spirit.

But why say this …
the sight of her will be enough
to unmoor me in the days to come
when against all feeling I’ll ignore her
and against all reason, … fail.

gallagher
30 jun 84
Irvine