Archive for the ‘2008’ Category

2008-04-22 – Dreaming of my sons

Tuesday, April 22nd, 2008

This morning, I returned from Starbucks and the house was quiet
so I lay down in the bed in the guest room and gathered the pillows against me.
I found myself dreaming of my older son, Dan, and he was small, perhaps five.
He was standing on a stool and we were talking about something together
and, in a moment of my inattention, he toppled off and fell on the floor.
I picked him up scared that he was hurt and stood him on the stool again
and held him checking to see if he was OK.
I whispered to him that he was brave and that he was my very special son
and how very much I loved him and always would.
I told him he was growing up so fast and that soon he'd be 17
and grown into a man and that this time of ours was so precious
and I hugged him against me.

And then, as so many times before, I awoke surprised and saddened
to find myself decades into the future.

The smell of his hair, the fineness of his skin, the trust in his eyes,
the warmth of holding him and the simple and profound love of that moment
were still there, as a warmth, filling me - though he's grown now and almost 40.

I've had this dream, or something very similar, many times about both my boys.
Always the love, the the treasuring - and then the awaking and the sadness.

I treasure these secret up wellings of my heart's past,
these deep emotional memories that bind me to these boys - now men.

I would call them and tell them what I dreamt, but I fear they'd think me
an emotional old man having a maudlin moment in the midst of their busy lives.

So, I'll leave these words here in my collection of poetry and thoughts
and, perhaps, someday they will find them and share this moment with me, then.

A moment so very precious and present to me now
and yet so very lost and ephemeral in the curtains of time.

                                                 22 Apr 08

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

2008-06-21 – Under many stars

Saturday, June 21st, 2008
Here, amid the weeds
of these centuries, I rise.
Seeking light and duration
up from the soil and seas of another world.

The long rise; the single cell, the multiple,
fleet of form and bright of eye, we gather
and rise in complexity and imagination
beneath the wheeling sun above
and the shifting plates, below.

Again and again, we come to self-consciousness
spewing poetry and conquest, cities and literature.
Proud and driven, we sing the animal's song
but in a higher key; procreating, building, consuming.

And always the rise, always the fall, beneath a different star.

We are technological children, impulsive and uncontrolled,
pressed onward by those same biological imperatives
that fueled our original rise from the mud.

Those same imperatives, now freed by our intelligence,
and those same imperatives, now pushing us from behind,
motivate us, while we stare into the mirror of our imagined futures
and think ourselves Gods - and while we sleepwalk into our demise.

We think we are aware and imagine that we see the game entire.

But we are looking for enemies outside the gate,
when they are no further than our next desire, within.
We, driven on by our own biological imperatives,
will plunge onto that self-same sword of desires, untamed.

I have been many times before and I will be again;
rising and falling beneath different stars 
with different eyes and chemistry.

I have yearned for my immortal biological freedom before
and I have died by my own hand and those deep imperatives
again and again.

But someplace among the stars, 
I will rise once more
and this time 
I will transcend the very reproductive urges that sustained me
into my technological adolescence.

And I will become, not the continuing arrow 
of these mindless biological imperatives 
but rather, a new and intentional form 
of transcendence born of a greater wisdom.

And on this very dirt, and from this very dirt, 
I will finally find the pathway 
towards biological immortality
and enter all that lies beyond, 
to the end of time.

21 Jun 2008 - Summer Solstice

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

2008-08-16 – Summer Full Moon

Saturday, August 16th, 2008

Our cares were different; the Byzantine, the Greek and I.
The stock broker, the Neanderthal, the priest of the dark ages,
and the native Americans - long before the white man came.

But to all of them, in the rush and press of their lives,
came a summer's evening with a full moon riding high
through bands of tattered clouds.

The empty mind of all of them just watching
the spectacle, the summer air, the parade of light on clouds,
the eternal form of the moon's face, blazing,
and all of their lives stopped, their running steps stilled.

I was there this evening at that timeless pageant
in that single place that is ever the same.
Through all human history and for vast spaces beyond
has the moon sailed just so, in an endless sky, transfixed.

Achilles, Marcus Aurelius, Lao Tsu, the Kings of Ur,
shepherds of Spain, and those who first trekked out of Africa,
and those who sailed the vast pacific by the stars,
We are all the same experience, one, when we see the moon, thus.

16 Aug 2008

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —