So all the confusion has come to this— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
that she lies sedated in some mental hospital
so beautiful…so intelligent…and incredibly, flawed.
Her house would’ve been too much tonight
to stay there with Sharon and Gary.
Every wall, every object saying,
‘she saw me as clearly as you,
she ordered me, she arranged me, she cared for me…’
I helped in her disassembly…for all her intelligence,
she just wasn’t made for for normal human stresses.
I was going to be strong, conservative, fight for my needs.
But hers, so immediate, just pushed her over some edge
when they were not immediately fulfilled
God, I ache for her…I love her
the part that was unflawed
was more than anyone I’ve known.
gallagher
september 01, 78
Archive for September, 1978
1978-09-01
Friday, September 1st, 19781978-09-02
Saturday, September 2nd, 1978I see her clearer all the time— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
she looks and judges quickly
and her judgments have large components
made from her emotional needs and biases
which she, of course, cannot see
because of her lack of the fair witness
and introspection
She announces how it is and then speaks loudly
in an attempt to dominate the situation
and drive home her view
and its all so illogical to start with
She says, ‘Yes, I believe it, prove me wrong!’
and I’m always left tearing her structures down
self-defensively …
she never starts from unbiased ground
And now she wants me to let her back in, emotionally
and even as she pledges recalitrance and submissivness
she drives her illogical a priori views home
like emotional wedges and never sees
her lack of logic or due process.
gallagher
2 September 78
1978-09-03
Sunday, September 3rd, 1978 Sensuous sister of mine,
how I wish you'd flown with me.
Now that the evenings come winding down,
I think of what I could've shown you
if you'd have trusted me.
Steppenwolf's dream is not so far away
as eight hours and an open mind.
Senses open to a wind so fine
you'd think that your soul is going to
burn up in the fire.
Its so easy then ... you just let go ...
but I, whispering from here and you there,
how will you ever know?
You've given me your time and love
again and again until sunrise
but we've never journeyed half so far
as we could have here.
I'm not going to steal your soul
but I'll show you mine
in a light you've never seen
my sweet sister.
gallagher
09-03-78 - poem to kathy a.
written at the end of
an acid trip I'd wanted
her to join me on
long beach
— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —