Archive for March, 1975

1975-03-23 Phones and Showers

Sunday, March 23rd, 1975
                       Phones and Showers
         Gut churned morning
           when I wake and all bets are off
         Cathy said I needed a big hurt
           and Rose obliged the next day.

         "It all just happened", Dennis,
           "He touched me like I usually don't let you
           so I could prove what
           I seldom let you prove to me;
           that I'm desirable.
           But its OK, it was just
           comforting he gave me,
           somehow, it seemed, then, I needed it,
           for your best wasn't good enough."

         No faith when I needed you, but, you're right,
           I was trying to separate us easily
           and play at a bit of machismo too
         and you called my bluff.

         Thank you, I think...
           I'd forgotten how hard
         those single games could get
           but now I should make it;
              no one could possibly kick me
                 that hard again.

                              gallagher
                              23 Mar 75
                              Buena Park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1975-03-25

Tuesday, March 25th, 1975
           I've tried so hard to be up front, Baby,
           knowing the others don't understand me
           or believe me...and hoping you did.
           But if I never hear your voice on that phone again
           or see you step from the shower
           washing him away...saying,
           "We just went to dinner, Dennis."
           It will be far too soon.

           Why couldn't you be up front, Baby?
           and not waste my time like that
           making all my efforts at honesty
           into just a pitiful taste in my mouth
           so that I'm reduced to wondering why
           I didn't hurt you first.
           Why I waited, out of reluctance,
           so we could share the bitter pill equally
           and together
           as the way of least hurt for both of us?

           Word fail me now
           I just see showers...and his hands
           and your game...as if I were Eric
           and as if I wasn't worth your effort
           to be up front, always and forever.
           Its cold here in this reality
           you've made for us.

                           gallagher
                           25 mar 75
                           Buena Park

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1975-03-26

Wednesday, March 26th, 1975
         The experience of the experience vanishes
         when that stretched diffuse form of the ego
         which becomes the other's vibes
         is infinitely stretched.

         Until, at last, its very diffuseness
         prevents suggestibility
         through the lack of that
         which would be suggested to.

         Until, at last, its very lack
         prevents domination.

         Until, at last, every nuance
         is all the story and every story is all the one.

         And here where thoughts need no time
         to register their values
         on the scale of domination or assimilation
         the experience of the experience, vanishes.

                                 gallagher
                                 26 mar 75

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —