Kathy’s love and friendship— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
helped me to see
that the deepest problem here
is our emotional insecurities.
It cuts through the heart
of everything else.
It is the stage
upon which we stand
imagining we are free.
This world … so full of activity
is so full of lies ….
The truth is … we don’t want
to be alone
and … we don’t want to die.
Everything else
just a furious dance
to cloud the issue
and to deny the ever present
potential for pain
and annihilation here.
gallagher
29 dec 85
1985-12-29
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1985-12-29
Last night I went to the restaurant— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
to see Lise again.
With some cocaine courage
and Kathy’s company waiting for me
I went once more to confront
what was ending between us.
And it ended, finally….
As it had to; from her side.
She and Anthony
made commitments in Mexico over Christmas
and so, my fears and strengths
and tolerances
no longer enter into it.
I have nothing to try to handle…
anymore.
She thought she would make it into 1986
in my poetry.
Perhaps… we’re two days short…
she may be a footnote.
This thing has finally ended
and I’m grateful.
gallagher
29 dec 85
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1985-12-29
Thank you …— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
but who.
Kathy’s love and friendship
last night
and this morning?
Rose and her family and my boys
and these days I’ve spent
in Seattle and Portland?
Lise and her commitment to Anthony
and the cord of hope
it finally cut within me?
Someone or something has healed me,
for this moment.
1985 draws to a close this Sunday afternoon.
With Lise gone to Mexico
with Anthony and his children.
With Kathy gone to spend New Years
with John in the Valley
And with Rose and my boys a thousand miles
away in foggy Seattle.
The rain falls softly on the water here.
And a white and mottled gray
fill the overcast sky.
A cup of tea at my elbow
as I listen to Sting
hoping that the Russians
love their children too.
Some beast in me now lies sleeping.
And some small peace
knows my name….
gallagher
29 dec 85
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1985-12-29
Poetry and reflection come for almost anything today— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
except Rose.
if emotional insecurity is
at the center of my problems
then she is the diamond
in the navel of it.
That I love her and need her
is to say I breath.
Life is nearly unimaginable
without her
at the center of my world.
Everything else has been transient
save her constant love.
gallagher
29 dec 85