This man is a friend
who satisfies my mind (as few have)
and communicates with me so well
(though we're of different pasts)
This man offers me pleasure
And I, a woman,
ponder complexities I feel.
My body eagerly remembers and imagines
While my mind - no, more than my mind,
something in my heart and soul -
Reminds me there's much more involved here.
Than Bodies.
Something inside me seems to whisper,
"Listen, listen."
What is it? I ask myself
At times before,
I thought my sense was only fear
But trying to ignore it brought regret and confusion.
Suddenly I'm seeming it may just come down to
Admitting and accepting what I truely feel:
I have this ideal that is so much more
than passing pleasure...
Dare I say what I really want
Is simply a love that is deep and enduring and true,
with someone who'll stay around in my life?
Making love without doubts or hesitation
Selves meetinbg on deepest levels,
Each comfortable in the other's caring...
When I try to accept less,
part of me wishes for more
and feels I've been denied
Do I expect too much?
But I can't just think about a temporary feel good
I don't want to be someone's conquest or diversion.
Part of me will feel I've sold my dreams and said,
"I don't believe I can have what I most desire."
Besides, if I give up what's true for me to please someone else,
I won't be acting from my real self - so
then how can I believe they love (or even know)
the "real me"?
And I'd be giving them the responsability to
"make me happy".
Joan
11 March 86
????dennisPOETRY?3-11#2.JR
I must listen to my own Sense of Things
and not try to force the love I desire,
but believe it will come in due time ...
as I continue to know myself better
and extend to those around me.
This man is a friend who means a lot.
I lke having him close, and
he may not understand,
but I must be true with what I feel
and take the chance
to be met with understanding
(Remembering that I must first
accept what I feel before I expect
someone else to)
Joan
11 march 1986
— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —