Archive for the ‘Years’ Category

1975-04-10

Thursday, April 10th, 1975
         Emptiness walks within me where she was
           and the days have become like months.

         Last night I went to her for rest
           but I lay open beside her to no avail.

         Something's gone, and I'm not sure what...
           some of it is my dominance of her,
         and some of it is the loss
           of my certainty of her regard,
         and some of it is my choice
           to avoid such rest stops,
         and some is my emotions
           blocking my vision of what it was
              that brought me here.

         It all will pass with time,
           says my reason,
              screams my mind....

                              gallagher
                              10 apr 75

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1975-04-10

Thursday, April 10th, 1975
         I came to this for detachment
         knowing, that of attachment, I'd had the best.

         I look in their eyes, crying, 'love me'.

         My needs, so long soothed,
         raging above my love and detachment
         mocking my purpose
         blocking my vision
         and in the back, fear whispering,
         'love's dying, you'll lose her,
         hurry, find your way before it's too late'.

         I'm right, though I can't remember why
         amid this rage of emotions.

         Let it be, is the way, I think,
         I fear I cannot turn away...

         The next depression I'll ride down
         to hell and back, I think
         just to see if it's as bad as I fear
         for, if I'm not gambling everything,
         then why am I here?

                                 gallagher
                                 10 Apr 75

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —

1975-04-15 Dominance

Tuesday, April 15th, 1975
                          Dominance

      We open up to those who, we feel,
      will share our picture of ourself.

         How confident we are is proportional
         to how much of a chance we're willing to take.

      We can resist those who won't agree with us
         up to a point.

      And we can be open towards those
         we're not sure will agree with us
            up to a point.

      To practice full openness all the time
         is self destructive
      and to seek to dominate all the time
         is cowardice.

      But somewhere there are our peers
         with whom dominance and openness balance.

      to scare yourself by opening to your peers is healthy
         to be an idealist and open yourself to non peers
            is insane whether you win or lose.

                              Gallagher
                              15 April 75

— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —