The concert continues … the players rearrange themselves— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
careful not to lose your identity as the roles change
what you are must be independent of who you’re with
or you can lose yourself if they leave.
The evening allowed me my time alone
the music, the running, the book by Irwin Shaw
that Kathy gave me … I think on every page…she read this.
I’m thirty … is it so bad … I love … am loved
if someone comes, stays or leaves … is it so bad?
can it be so bad if I am constant, if I can resist
the maddening urge to ‘need’ love in order to feel OK
resist the urge to invest myself
at the first sign of acceptance from another.
Just love them as they are, as they come…
am I a coward … Kathi said I hedge my bets
but she says this from inside a marriage
I just don’t know … I’ll invest all I can
without losing myself or my beliefs
and if its too hard, I’ll pull back.
I cannot do better
win or lose
and so the concert continues….
gallagher
11 september 78
Archive for the ‘Kathy’ Category
1978-09-11
Monday, September 11th, 19781978-09-12
Tuesday, September 12th, 1978Sensuous sister I see you … us … in the pages— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
of Shaw’s Rich Man, Poor Man.
Our lusty need to win winning out
beyond names and roles … our hours passionate
like his characters are lusty.
Our pasts springboards into lives and futures;
the options, the futures, the magic and the dead ends,
I see us there in his pages
and here in our days.
No regrets in these living hours
I hope you’ll always be my sister and my friend.
gallagher
09-12-78 about/to kathy a.
long beach
1978-10-17
Tuesday, October 17th, 1978San Pedro’s empty, the day’s as gray as ice— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
friends departed…the feeling’s not nice
Kathy’s gone from Nichols now my lunch times lonely
I didn’t realize how her presence in a nearby room
had lent the air of caring to this harbor’s gloom
real beyond titles and real beyond roles
we could feel our emotions and touch and be friends
she had her problems and I, mine…
confusions and wantings…we crossed society’s lines
and if last names carried stories, our first names were fine
we never carried expectations beyond the easy times
time conspires, the winter unwinds itself
the lines to friends grow distant and fine
some node born of autumn in the shorter day’s winds
is drawing me straight thru it
my current conjunction of sins
gallagher
1 oct 78