Helen wings her way to me.— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
Rose and I lay in disrepair.
Insanity grows, the peaceful feeling goes.
Today someone asked me why I was always so happy,
I must be very resilient.
The ground moves, neon glows, abstractions and anxiety.
These days spin, I’m split… die or heal, I beg.
“Come, life.”, I said, “Show me everything.”
Such blatant mockery… supreme tests for me.
I rise agonized to each dance, and call them on….
Houston… does it matter, was I only dreaming?
I used to know, only months ago…
that I could, would, survive.
And now I agonize over love’s loss again.
A little Vodka… the time goes.
God knows, I don’t.
gallagher
19 January 1979
Archive for the ‘Long Beach’ Category
1979-01-19
Friday, January 19th, 19791979-01-25 The divorce
Thursday, January 25th, 1979The divorce— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
So tell me how I’m supposed to feel…
this paper says ten years of marriage and love
are void and null.
Gone from life into history…
Texas…Mississippi…Washington…
Douglas…college…drugs…a son…
growing…tears…holding together late at night
struggling…pain…anger…needs…love.
The paper is pink…filed in some huge book
at the hall of justice
and we, just citizens again.
I feel naked and she’s some stranger.
It was so familiar…’My wife.’…she’s my wife, Rose,
no more.
I’m sad, my lady, after all our reasoning and logic
and all the times I said, ‘…just a paper….’
I’m still sad…if you had been home just now when I called
I would’ve told you so
my love … my … my ….
gallagher
25 January 1979
1979-02-02 Willie Dynamite
Friday, February 2nd, 1979Willie Dynamite— Copyright 1965-2008 by Dennis Gallagher —
My life lies crumbling, just like all the rest
my vision and my agony, the ever present test.
My love lies sleeping, my love she gives her best,
to a man who’s such a wastrel, he thinks that love’s a test.
I turn and weary at the rest her love gives me
and I’d rather empty faces and the words that strangers give.
I must have been born a vagabond, a vagabond and a fool.
I can’t divide my integrity and her living golden rule.
I AM Willie Dynamite born again in Irish clothes
But that self same selfishness lies just here within.
I love life’s every gesture and I embrace it all to win
but our love can grow weary and our passion stretched too thin.
I know the apex of my fortune as my willful test,
its I, myself, against integrity, against my best,
but it doesn’t matter who the actor or how I name the plot
its only I in the endless light who must evermore decide.
gallagher
2 Feb 1979